Trey Burke vs. Trey Kerby, an epic matchup five months in the making, settled once and for all in the Las Vegas heat.
Then after the jump, get familiar with STEVE HOLT. Enjoy it!
I don’t know what I think is the funniest part of this — that the Jazz made such a thing in the first place, the video itself or the fact that even his own team knows that so few people cared about Marvin Williams’ return from a foot injury that they can make a video out of it and get a laugh. Probably a three-way tie, now that I’m having a chance to really break this thing down. Good stuff, Jazzers.
This picture has been kicking around the internet for a couple years now, but since they’re both in the NBA now and it just showed up on Reddit this morning, I feel like it’s fresh enough for us to enjoy again for the first time. And just to clear things up, since this is such an old picture that it was probably taken on film, that’s Jared Sullinger on the left in the white shirt. I know it’s hard to tell since he’s changed quite a bit since then, but you’re just going to have to trust me on this one.
But yeah, these two were besties back in the day, so it makes sense that they’d pass time playing video games while sitting on the most 90s comforter imaginable. And it makes even more sense that two more of their friends would relax by pulling fake wrestling moves against each other while the other two were playing video games. This is how you be a kid, even if you do end up in the NBA some day.
I think it’s safe to say that we all love NBA mascots. Benny the Bull, Moondog, the Gorilla — you know, all those guys who aren’t Pierre the Pelican or the BrooklyKnight. They make the game more fun, they make us laugh and when your team is bad, it’s a lot more enjoyable to watch a mascot pretending to eat a cheerleader than whatever’s going on on the court.
But it’s not all fun and games with mascots, even though that is literally exactly what it all is with mascots. Derrick Favors found that out the hard way. From Grantland’s Zach Lowe:
In the huddles, when the coach is talking, do you ever get distracted watching Jazz Bear do his crazy stunts?
My second year, when I wasn’t playing that much, I definitely did. But now that I’m playing a lot, I don’t have time. I can’t be doing that.
Ah. You have to pay attention now.
Yeah. I remember one time, he walked into the stands and got my girlfriend with the Silly String.
Wait: Did he know she was your girlfriend?
I didn’t even know what happened! She told me after the game. And she was hot.
Oh, yeah. She was hot about it.
Did you confront him? This is great.
I didn’t say nothing to him.
Maybe he didn’t know.
I don’t think he knew, but I didn’t say anything to him, because I didn’t think it was a big deal. But she was hot about that.
Oh snap. A classic example of when mascot stunts go wrong. It’s not as bad as when Benny the Bull destroyed that guy’s arm, but angering the girlfriend of one of the team’s most important players is probably frowned upon. I mean, you want to keep your players happy in general, and you definitely don’t want your zany mascot to be the reason he’s upset.
But don’t worry, guys. It’s all good in the Favors household.
Are you still with the same girl?
Still with her.
Whew. So Jazz Bear didn’t contribute to the end of any relationship.
Oh, no. We’re fine.
Phew. Can you even imagine being broken up by a mascot stunt gone wrong? What a potential crisis diverted. Who knows what could have happened if this went the other way. Maybe his girlfriend breaks up with him because of the Silly String, which then leads to Favors’ performance tanking and the Jazz’s rebuilding going down the tubes — all because of a mascot.
The butterfly effect consequences of this simple mascot joke could have been dire. Lucky for everyone involved, Derrick Favors’ girlfriend is pretty levelheaded about the whole thing. It’s just Silly String, after all. My it’s very nature, it’s silly. Things could have been much worse.
Smart move, Rudy Gobert. No one wants to be the new Timofey Mozgov before they’ve even officially started their career. Better to just take a huge jump, lower your arms and watch a high quality Blake Griffin dunk at rim level. It’s quite the view.